"Jibber, Jabber, what's the matter!" razzled Mark to our son, Seth. This particular day, Seth was on a roll with his tongue and vocal chords.  I think he woke up that way.  Words just blended one into the other and weaved in and then back out of my ears.

Off to church we went.  Seth looking spiffy in his new shirt, tie and sweater. He gets pretty proud of his ties and is gaining a small collection.  At church he points out all the "pretty" ties and the "neat" ones the men wear. He also points out all the "beautiful" dresses the ladies wear and notices the bright colors. They are getting used to him coming up and pointing to their dresses and/or ties or pointing from across the room.  At first it was a bit disconcerting, I am sure. It is something we are working on. "Don't point, Seth! You will make people nervous!"

This particular day, after church and after potluck, a person gave Seth a puzzle. I saw him walking all around the room with it and asked him where it came from.  His short term memory is a bit weak, so he started hollering all around, "Who is the person that gave me this puzzle.  Who is the person that gave me this puzzle?"  I was sitting next to my friend named, Nancy and asked her who gave him the puzzle.  It happened to be her.  I told her that Seth was looking for her so she raised her hand and waved at him and said "I gave you the puzzle, Seth." 

Seth came over to her and she sat him down on a chair beside her and began asking him questions. Well, this was her day! Remember?  Seth was on a vocal roll. Off he went.  He was invited and he let 'er rip! He went through all of our birthdays and how old we were.  He went through grandma and grandpas birthdays and revealed their age. (I have long ago given up trying to hide my age, so I just try and look younger so the age and person don't match up!) Seth's sister, her husband and their baby also had birthdays and ages.  Then he had to find out each ones birthday that was sitting in earshot.

After he did the age and birthday thing, next he had to tell about all of his puzzles.  The Puzzle Boy strikes again!  After Nancy was so patient, smiling, nodding, and being so very polite to him, he took off to someone else that paid him some attention and Jeanie got the run-down.  This went on for quite some time until I decided I would rescue my poor, wonderful friends!  I took Seth aside with much effort and explained to him that it was not his turn to talk anymore.  He needed to give it a break.  Others needed a turn.  "Oh, but I just have one more thing to say....."  Blah, blah, blah.  It was beginning to all run together monotone like and shot easily between the ears. 

He did get the picture and did try and sit still while the ladies talked.  He did take his turn. I hope the lesson sticks.

I am so proud of my church friends.  They really proved themselves!  Bravo!  Typically, Seth just sits and grins and listens, but he really got on a talking roll this time and occasionally that will happen.  I don't know what creates it.  Sometimes it precipitates seizures.

One thing I will say, is that it is wonderful to have a Sense of Place.  A place to go where I do not have to explain what is going on.  A place where Seth is accepted for who he is.  A place where we as parents are not scrutinized. A place of love.

This is a tribute to those who take the time to care for us as parents.  I think that perhaps the generosities are more for us than for our kids, sometimes.  I appreciate that. Perhaps it is just because someone wants to step out of their comfort zone, and learn about what makes autism tick, but nevertheless, or for whatever reason, Seth appreciates being recognized as a human being.  We love having a Sense of Place that we can go to each week other than just our home. This place happens to be our church family.

I hope that you will find a Sense of Place for yourself.  A place of acceptance.  A place where you can be you. A place where you are loved!

Until Next Time, Find that place!  Develop that place.  It takes time!  Time is the crucial ingredient.  If we flit from one place to the next, no one can really get to know you and you can't get to know them.

Nancy Lynne